i think that in certain points in your life, there are different levels to which commitment exists, and sometimes there are limits which ought to be followed, be it for your own good or for others. there was a reason why earlier in the year i made a choice, and there is a reason why now i make another similar yet different choice, however these reasons are completely different.
been a long time since i blogged. in case anyone was wondering, the last blog entry's memories refer to all my odac memories of expeditions, treks, adventures..they're all so precious i wish i could hold on to them forever.
i want to never forget the memories. honest.
i need some sleep - eels
hello..
goodness it feels so good to be back online again. haha. jen and i have made a pact to EARN our online hours. so its like, if we mug for 5 hours (reduced from 10 hours) throughout the week, we earn one hour online for the weekend, and its another 5 hours for subsequent online hours. haha. so currently i've earned one hour online, and am..halfway there for my second hour. yays. haha.
okay. its been a long week. well actually it hasnt, the week passed really fast. but still. i'm glad the weekend is here. i've been...playing goldminer, all thanks to jamin, it's SUPER addictive!! ridiculous. i can play for like..hours. haha. sheesh.. actually. i dont know why i'm blogging, dont have anything much to say.
hello!..today was a good day. but for some reason i'm insanely tired. haha. kept falling asleep during the advertisements of AI. but can i just say that diana was really really good tonight. yes.
sorryinadvanceithinkiowethisone.icantbringmyselftostudybioletalonekeepawake.imsoscoofedupandnoonewilleverknow.
hello! today was another school day. haha. mugging in school after chem s. haha. not very successful. but well..it was entertaining. haha. yay i have rocky friends in school!..nothing beats that. :) thanks jamz and dawyl, and the occasional pop by from derek and then yee yen. haha. :) oh and for entertaining sms-es too..
omgomgomg. survivor. rawrz. if rupert won immunity he'd win. and if jenna hadnt stepped off she may have won. and now i think rob just may win. omgomgomg. how can they make me wait until ELEVEN. i hate that show eye for a guy. like HELLO. who's more important, survivor's finale or eye for a guy's?? JEEZ. prioritize PLEASE. and chem test, its scoofed. i dont care i dont care. survivor survivor! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
okay i came online half an hour ago to blog, but then i discovered that blogger's changed their layout! so i started reading all my past blog entries. whoa good times and bad times. a blog's a good way to keep check of wads happened to you. anyway so now i cant blog. no time. haha. gonna go.
season finale of the oc has gotta be the saddest episode of any serial i've ever watched.
okay the weekend has come. tonight shall be more productive that all previous nights. i hope. this weekend's practically blown too, got kayag tmr, kalashatvam at night, ora on sunday, lunch at godma's place and maybe dinner w family on sunday. gone. i shall keep monday free. must mug for lecture tests. mustmugmustmug.
hello all!..today was a good day!..sch ended at 1230..slacked a while while waiting for cheech, then cheech and saus n i went to city hall to first collect my specs, then eat at marche! followed by some nice nice place at the basement of suntec. cant remember wad its called. then we were full and..realised we'd wasted the whole afternoon, so decided to go back to sch, but not before going to 7-11 to indulge more. hahaa. "dont hold back! indulge!".. it was damn fun. we rock. ahha. should do it again. then we got to sch around five, i went to talk to jen, and at five plus we played ball games till forever (seven plus) followed by dinner (not for cheech sau n i-too full) and jenga!! but since we slacked so majorly today, we need to start full force mugging pls!!..rocks (: i like. this is life.
jamz isnt online so i cant check to see if he's cycling to sch tmr. listen to the crazy plan..shuold i do it!.. borrow his bike cycle to buona vista mrt at 12.30 tmr, take a train to city hall, collect my specs, take a train back, cycle back to sch, mug till 5 or 530, and go for odac games. how rocky right. haha. alternatively i can walk to the mrt i GUESS. laziness overwhelms me. and the desire to not return to sch after collecting my specs builds up. ahha. let's play netball at city hall guys. haha. riiight. okay shall go off now. chem s ended real early today!..6.15. and so did chem r!..so went for nice class dinner. well a bunch of us. so fun!.. :) yay. nice dinner g-ians. yall rock my world pls. totallllllllllllyyyyy.
okay bloggin at home. kamya yu cheated me!..ahha i forgot you didnt have sch. so fine, i was the only one running on backup energy resulting in slight psychoticness. haha. anyway, our "training" today was damn slack la!..ahhaha. for the benefit of the rest, mel cheech jamz and i ran to jamin's hse, then slacked, drank, ate, then proceeeded to walk to mel's hse, where more slacking was done and russel allowed me to carry him! he's so cute i love russel. haha. then we walked back to sch. hahahaha. race training indeeeeed. haha. damn fun. :) today was fun. whee. so i didnt collect my new specs in the end. shall collect it on wed. hopefully!.. shall keep this short. i have a lot to do, tho i think it wont get done, but anyway, i wanna sleep early. haha. g'night all. love lots kids.
OMG i hate the computers in school. they probably have this anti-blogging thing la. goodness. i was just typing a blog entry just now about my LAST blogging experience in the lab when it didnt publish in the end because the site was down, and then suddenly there was this alert thing and the computer shut down in 30 seconds. exactly like my home computer. except w the help of jayce i disabled the nonsense shutdown precaution thing. sigh. okay anyway.
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05/01/2003 - 06/01/2003
06/01/2003 - 07/01/2003
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09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003
10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003
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02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004
03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
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06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
Sunday, May 30, 2004
i can only hope that the people important to me in my life are fine, cos tho i may like to think i am capable of ensuring this, i'm not. but trust me on this, that when i think i need to be there i will be there, and when you need me to be there and i'm not, all you have to do is call cos that's what a friend is for, and that's what i want to be at this point in time. of cos, what is reassuring is that the love n friendship is everpresent, and is not worthy of mistakes or wrong turns. so i will always love you as you have become and are a part of my life, but let there be no banners of security, of commitment, for that's when the unnecessary fear of hurt arises.
the hols are here. i love you people. enjoy yourselves!!
this week's been..stunning. in a way i could say it's the best i've ever felt in like forever. let's just leave it at that. even today's bio test's grade couldnt have made me tha-at miserable cos even tho i felt useless, helpless, stupid, and sick of it all, i'm glad i had something else to hold on to and think about.
drained. slept damn late last night, shall try and focus tonight and get some rest later.
black eyed peas concert was damn fun. rugby finals was cool. hockey finals was amazing. and everything else that happened in my life's breathtaking.
i need some sleep
you cant go on like this
i tried counting sheep
but there's one i always miss
everyones said
i'm getting down too low,
everyone's said you just gotta let it go,
you just gotta let it go, you just gotta let it go.
i need some sleep
time to put the old horse down,
i'm in too deep
and the wheels keep spinning round,
everyones said,
i'm getting down too low,
everyones said
you just gotta let it go, you just gotta let it go,
you just gotta let it go.
just gotta let it go.
just gotta let it go.
just gotta let it go.
went to watch shrek 2 today, its a great show, and jayce n i agree that the pussy is the cutest. btw cats shouldnt have bigbig eyes. haha. wasted on them. erm. okay. yup so anyway i was doing sats 2 math just now, and then i started thinking that maybe i should have gone to belumut cos it'll be the last expedition i'd probably have gone for before like..the A levels. but well. i guess my parents are right, i do need to study also. sigh. maybe i should have begged to go. haha. oh well. its okay la. i hope the j1s+cheech+jamin+teachers have fun and take photos. yes. ms tang will take photos! haha. if she went. i think she did.
anyway tmr's a long day. rawr. shall try and make it productive.
and i think i may be falling sick. head feels heavy, sore throat still kinda there. tho i still think it was instigated by the durian feast on thurs. or was that fri. cant remember.
the holidays are coming. cant wait. and nurie's coming back. cant wait either. :) yays. everyone out there take kare.
this week's passed by really fast once again. sats two is round the corner!! just hit me yesterday how close it was. yeah. shall try to mug for it in the coming 2 weeks. okay i think i'll update later. cant think of anything good to say, must be pms effects. wadeva. kk byebye. rawrz btw.
i've learnt that everyone has their own deep dark secret which they either tell a select few, or keep locked up forever. it amazes me.
and life has been draining of late. i want to know what to do and when i need to do it.
and today i had a great day cos after bio test there was nothing to really worry about (yet), and we went out to eat at orchard again!..haha lots and lots of ice cream. :) RAWRZ. and then basketball after that in the evening. i like!.. haha another slack wednesday. shall go off now, most likely to sleep. ahhhhh my sleep debt is insane!...ahhhhhhh.
I'm finding my way back to sanity again
Though I don't really know what
I'm going to do when I get there
Take a breath and hold on tight
Spin around one more time
And gracefully fall back to the arms of Grace
SURVIVOR ALL STAR FINALE TODAY. RAWRZ.
I heard there was a secret chord
that David played and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
Well it goes like this :
The fourth, the fifth, the minor fall and the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah...
Well your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrough ya
She tied you to her kitchen chair
She broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
Baby I've been here before
I've seen this room and I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew ya
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
But love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
There was a time when you let me know
What's really going on below
But now you never show that to me do ya
But remember when I moved in you
And the holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah
Well, maybe there's a God above
But all I've ever learned from love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew ya
It's not a cry that you hear at night
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah...
thank God its a show. i dont think i'd be able to take it if i led their kinda life. it's too much for me.
ohhh and i was on the train home after jamz's nice mom sent us to the mrt, and then like..when i got on at buona vista there was this big black hiker backpack lying abandoned near the door, the door which doesnt open until city hall. yup. so i looked around, saw this damn cool funky ang moh guy, so i asumed it was his. then like...after a while i noticed that the ang moh got off..without the bag.. (suddenly he wasnt so cool anymore cos he wasnt the backpacker i thought him to be)..and like so it was..ehh..so weird..the bag's like..looking abandoned. haha. i was thinking of the mrt message "please do not leave you belongings unattended to..blablabla"..so i was staring at the bag, wondering wad stupid hiker could like, get off the train and leave his bag behind. this woman who got on at like outram park i think saw me staring at it, so she was like..ehh is that your bag?..so i was like no. and she started like becoming really paranoid-looking, and she was looking around at everyone else wondering who's bag it could be. then finally she was getting REALLY anxious, and she got off at raffles place like..panicky a bit. so i was watching her, noticed her looking back at the train like as tho it might explode or something. i noticed she didnt go wait opposite for a train but instead went up the escalator...THEN..after she left, just before city hall, some uncool girl went to claim the bag. (obviously cos the door was gonna open and she didnt want her bag to fall out). so i was like...ohhh it's that moron's bag. yeah. then i was thinking, oh no that poor lady, i bet she went to report it, and like, in the end, it's a false alarm. so i like couldnt do anything anyway, so i sat back..waiting for kallang to come so that my discman would have reception for radio. yeah. then at like lavender, these two smrt guys got on the train and came up to the exact same spot the bag used to be lying in, and were looking around. then they saw the lady with the bag and were like, is this YOURS. haha. then the lady was like yeahh. so they moved off and started looking elsewhere.
anyway wad i'm trying to say is that, pple are quite paranoid lately, AND of cos with good reason, and that the authorities are REALLY doing their job. good job smrt guys. so. yeah. i remember thinking to myself, (before i noticed the paranoid lady in the train who was also looking at the bag), okay if anything happens, its truly fated. strange how in times of doubt or fear or paranoia the first thing that comes to me is not logic but faith.
anyway, joke of the day: "can i hold your hand? NO. can i hold your arm? NO. can i hold your shoulder? NO. I DONT EVEN KNOW YOU. can yu STOP pestering me, i'm NOT interested in YOU! then can YOU NOT LEAN ON THE (something)POLE, i need to BALANCE TOOO."
looking forward to sch, and odac tmr.
so i'm in the comp lab. school has ended and i'm surprised i got thru it relatively awake! tho i did slip off during chem tut..but that's ok i dont think i missed much. and it was prob only for like..15 minutes or something. yeahh. wonder how kamya's doing in school. hahaaha. considering she was sprawled on the floor of her kitchen at two something am yesterday as we complained to each other about our states of life.
SHIT ITS GONNA SHUTDOWN AGAIN> BYEBYE> I MEAN SCOOF, NOT SHIT> BYE PUBLISH PLS.